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Texas Sharon's Bluedaze

Fracking News

Christmas Dysfunction in the Family

December 25, 2007 By TXsharon

Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk
At our Christmas party
We were drinkin’ champagne punch and homemade eggnog
Little sister brought her new boyfriend
He was a Mexican
We didn’t know what to think of him til he sang Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad

Brother Ken brought his kids with him
The three from his first wife Lynn
And the two identical twins
From his second wife MaryNell
Of course he brought his new wife Kay
Who talks all about AA
Chain smokin’ while the stereo plays Noel, Noel,
The first Noel

Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
Mix margaritas when the eggnog’s gone
Send somebody to the Quik-Pak store
We need some ice and an extension cord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite
A box of tampons and Marlboro Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family

Fran and Rita drove from Harlingen
I can’t remember how I’m kin to them
But when they tried to plug their motor home in
They blew our Christmas lights
Cousin David knew just what went wrong
So we all waited on our front lawn
He threw the breaker and the lights came on and we sang Silent Night
Oh Silent Night

Carve the turkey turn the ballgame on
Make Bloody Marys cause we all want one
Send somebody to the Stop ‘n Go
We need some celery and a can of fake snow
A bag of lemons and some Diet Sprite
A box of tampons and Salem Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family

Feliz Navidad!

About Sharon Wilson

Sharon Wilson is considered a leading citizen expert on the impacts of shale oil and gas extraction. She is the go-to person whether it’s top EPA officials from D.C., national and international news networks, or residents facing the shock of eminent domain and the devastating environmental effects of natural gas development in their backyards.

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Comments

  1. WhosPlayin? says

    December 26, 2007 at 2:49 am

    I love this song. Laughed my head off the first time I heard it. So Texas…

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